Beautiful reminiscences.

5 years ago... My family was perfect. 

Grandma has never smiled that way again eversince.

Aunt and uncle migrated to Australia along with my two little cousins who meant the world to me.

But the saddest part is, Grandpa is no more...

It was his birthday yesterday. Our very first time celebrating without him.

Despite all the gloominess and sadness written all over our faces when we visited the temple, we still held on to our tears like it was forbidden to cry. Knowing that once someone starts, others might be unable to control too.

Mom and grandma were very strong indeed.

My brother and me often visit the temple after picking him up from his tuitions. Ocassionaly, we'll bring lillies along too...=)

There were times when I honestly felt his presence around me. Even at home during the first few weeks after he passed. Mom told me that after 49 days, usually one will be reborn into another form of life. To believe it or not I am not sure either. 

One thing I know for sure is that he misses us very much. If you're a buddhist, then you might know those two little red thingy shaped like beans the chinese used to throw to ask the dead for an answer.

I've asked Grandpa that particular question many times. The answer is ALWAYS YES. 

And that's when I can no longer control those tears from flowing. 

We all miss him soooo much around the house too. Although he was bedridden for almost 3 years, he still knew what was going on and it's his presence that kept this house somehow feel like a whole.

It certainly is tear-jerking to see how my perfect family is no more complete. I guess these are paths that everyone of us will have to walk on eventually. To say goodbye to loved ones... and to move on. 

But it was an honour to be part of this family of his. To be his one and only granddaughter and to have received 19 years of love from such an amazing man. 

Happy 75th Kong-Kong. Wherever you are now, be sure that you're happy and always know that you will forever remain dear in our hearts.

God the lump in my throat hurts so bad. It's late now I better be off. Night loves. =)